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To the Mentor: Mentors Don’t “Need” Protégés

Something felt, well, wrong about the whole thing. I had gone to him for advice, some professorial counsel about choices that lay before me, as I was nearly finished with my graduate studies. I had options, six options to be exact. However, when I left his office that day, I had, well, a seventh option. The person I sought to gain some clarifying insight from for my future turned the conversation around on me. His solution to my over-abundance of career options was to reduce them to one, the one HE needed help with.

Russell WestRussell West

How to Help Someone Not Change

We have this funny idea that if we can make people see how angry we really are, then they’ll change. If we can make them feel our anger, then they’ll finally get the point and change. But it doesn’t work that way. Anger actually has the opposite effect to what we intend. Anger hardens; love, peace, and gentleness soften. Anger condemns; the Holy Spirit convicts.

Stephen AltroggeStephen Altrogge